I've been reading up on my weddingisms lately.. Music choice seems to be the re-occurring subject that a lot of people seem to be oblivious to. Since the boy and I have pretty extensive backgrounds in music (in studies and hobbies) we know lots about it. But do we know enough..
Here are a couple tips from the Knot about your "clever" music choices..
#1. Starting the Ceremony in Silence
Because of the focus on your big entrance, it's easy to forget that chunk of ceremony time before you appear. There will likely be 20-30 minutes where your guests will be waiting for the service to start -- don't try their patience with absolute silence.
#2. Skipping the sound check
With destination weddings growing more popular, brides and grooms have to consider making remote locations microphone-friendly. Be sure to carefully assess the setting when coordinating with performers. Crashing waves could easily drown out a string quartet or trio of flutes, and a windy mountain peak could render even the strongest voice silent. It's important to be flexible. Though you may have your heart set on a harp, losing the music entirely will be far more disappointing.
#3. Offending your Officiant
It may be your wedding day, but unfortunately it's not your church. When it comes to ceremony music, many churches and synagogues have certain rules and regulations that will affect your choice of tunes that can be played as you walk up the aisle. It's common for religious congregations to prohibit either secular songs or ones by a composer with a reputation for anti-Semitism. Some may also ban electric music entirely or take issue with an orchestra at the altar. So speak to your wedding officiant before you have a classical version of Journey's "Don't Stop Believin" composed for your wedding's ceremony.
#4. The Unending First Dance
You may have fallen in love to "Free Bird" but imagine how long nine minutes and eight seconds will feel alone on the dance floor. Pay careful attention to your love song's length before committing to it for your first dance. If your heart is set on a certain ballad, look into having it cut down to a reasonable length. You can either work on this with your DJ, find a local music studio, or if you know your way around iTunes, you can download the song and do it yourself.
**First DanceTip: Let Guests Cut In Coordinate to have your attendants join you on the floor for the last two minutes of the first dance. Your maid of honor and best man can lead the way.
#5. Letting the DJ Take Control
Don't fall into the trust trap just because your DJ has a fabulous reputation. While you should be comfortable letting your band guide the music, providing a play list (or better yet a no-playlist) will leave you happier in the end. You certainly don't want a song with painful associations to pop up unexpectedly.
#6. Blowing Out the Speakers
Despite the presence of alcohol and all your college friends, a wedding shouldn't resemble a frat party. Club-level volume during the reception will frustrate older family members and make it impossible for your guests to talk to one another.
#7. Playing Punk Songs During Dinner
Sure you want to hear everything in your iTunes collection, but don't destroy your sit-down dinner because you had to fit "I Wanna Be Sedated" in there somewhere. Music should fit the mood of the moment. Stick with instrumentals or soft ballads during your cocktail hour and then transition into the dance party with whatever suits you.
#8.Rocking Out to R-rated Songs
Yes, these are more liberal times, but be careful not to confuse progressive with perverted. This is your day, and you shouldn't focus on pleasing everyone with your musical selection, but there's a glaring line you should avoid crossing. "Humpty Dance" -- fair. "The Thong Song" -- pushing it. Keep it to a sensible PG-13 for best results among all age groups.
#9. Too Much of a Good Thing
You both may truly love late '80s hair bands, but five full hours of Def Leppard and someone might actually go deaf. A night of Nirvana or a rap-based reception is just as bad. Your wedding is a celebration of your relationship -- one that likely involves music -- but it's also a gift to share with family and friends. Keep them in mind when developing your playlist.